Because by letting people joke about these things, I’m part of the problem. Every sexist, rape, and gay joke is attacking me even if it isn’t directed at me. I’m a woman, I’ve been taken advantage of, and I’m bi. So why haven’t I been standing up for myself and everyone else?
I need to step it up. In my head, I’ve been making up excuses. I need to pick my battles, I’ll alienate people, I live in a conservative town, I’ll lose friends, I’ll cause a big debate, etc etc. I’m so ashamed of myself…I feel sick to my stomach for my lack of action. But, as of now, I’m acknowledging that I need to make a change and I’m going to fucking do it.
The biggest excuse for me not speaking up?
Fear.
So I’m going to stop being afraid of what other people will say. Yes, I’ll probably get insulted, offended and verbally attacked. A lot of my more close-minded friends will be put-off or just plain stop liking me. I can handle it. Being liked is not as important as standing up for what’s right.
I’m not going to sit by and let people spread their ignorance, especially when I know how painful it is to hear. I encourage you to do the same.
Because every sexist joke just perpetuates the idea that women are not equal, and that’s okay. Do you really want you female friends to think less of themselves?
And gay jokes add to the idea that being non-heterosexual is something to be ashamed of and ostracized for. LGBTQ people already get enough hate. One of your friends might be LGBTQ or questioning their sexuality—they need your support and acceptance, not your dumb homophobic jokes.
And when you joke about rape you are keeping the idea that slut-shaming is okay, our rape-culture is normal, and that it’s the victim’s fault. Plus, statistically speaking, one of your friends has been or will be sexually assaulted. We should have to teach how to not get raped, we should be teaching not to rape in the first place.
Think about your friends who, chances are, have been hurt by these jokes too.
When you joke about any of these things, you’re hurting someone. You are taking a serious, painful issue and trivializing it. You are making it okay to be ignorant.
No. Making fun of someone for who they are and what they’ve been through is not fucking okay.
This goes for every offensive joke, not just the ones I mentioned. I plan on speaking up for all people—not just the issues that trouble me personally. I’m simply speaking about these ones because I hear them the most, and they hurt me.
I’m not saying you can’t laugh about things. You can tell the difference between an actually humorous joke and an attack on someone disguised as a joke. Let me put it this way—does the joke support and perpetuate a negative stereotype? Then don’t fucking say it. People have a hard enough time getting through life without you making a shitty one-liner about it.
I’ll say it again: I’m all for humor. Just leave the harmful jokes out of it. Saying these ‘jokes’ aren’t funny. This also applies to “that’s gay.” I could go on about this too, but I think I’ve made my point. Besides, saying these things just makes you sound so unintelligent as it just shows your lack of vocabulary and capacity of thinking for yourself.
